Here's one of my favorite things to look at. This is Landon pigging out on some Chilie's Baby Back Ribs. He never stops chewing!
Here's one of the boys singing...if you can call it that. Oh, and playing instruments.
The last couple of weeks have been the toughest mothering I've experienced so far. I know, I know all you mothers of teenagers...it's only going to get harder. But before I go into complete depression, I have to deal with the present before I get completely freaked out about the future.
Lately, I've seen such a rebellion in one of my sons and it scares me all the way to my toes. Disrespect doesn't begin to describe what I've been witnessing. It's like I'm watching a spiritual battle take place and my son is the battlefield. It's not very easy to watch. I've found myself sobbing at his bedside at night just because he looked so peaceful and I hadn't seen him look like that in a while. I prayed like crazy. Shawn and I are always trying to think of things we can do differently to help our children. I know, we have a huge roll to play in his life, but I also know that I am not in control of him, that only God is. Right now there is nothing we could tweak to make this better for him. This was on God. But, you know, what I learned this week (which I thought I already knew) was that God wants control of our kids. I hold on to them so tight that I leave no room for God to do anything. He was telling me, " He is my son, not yours. Let me take care of him!" So I did. I backed off, and let God move in. What a difference. I felt that I was loosing him already, but little did I know, that I had to give him away to gain him back!
My hands were busy through the day.
I didn't have much time to play
The little games you asked me to,
I didn't have much time for you.
I'd wash your clothes.
I'd sew and cook,
But when you'd bring your picture book
And asked me please to share your fun,
I'd say, "A little later son."
I'd tuck you in all safe at night
And hear your prayers, turn out the light,
Then tiptoe softly to the door...
I wish I'd stayed a minute more.
For life is short, the years rush past.
A little boy grows up so fast.
No longer is he at your side,
His precious secrets to confide.
The picture books are put away,
There are no longer games to play.
No good-night kisses, no prayers to hear,
That all belongs to yesteryear.
My hands once busy, now are still
The days are long and hard to fill.
I wish I could go back and do
The little things you asked me to.
(Author Unknown)I
(I'm sorry this is so long, and if you've made it this far, I'm almost done, I promise. I probably wouldn't have read any ones blog if it was this long.)
So, I want to live as a mother, with no regrets. I want to be that lighthouse, on guard, at my post, watching over my family. But I've learned the best way to do this is on my knees. Thank you God for teaching me, for not giving up on me even when I do stupid things and try to take your place. Please forgive me for all the years I've been parenting and I haven't let you parent them at all. I love you! Thank you for loving me and my family as much as you do!
Andy getting the first order.
Tyler helping Andy with the big table. They all did such a great job, especially since they're all too young yet to have their own jobs.
Haley and Brittney making drinks. (Landon had my phone right before I took this pic and I think his little buttery fingers got on the lens...that's why it's so hazy)
With a clean lens...here are the Pastor and some of the board members showing their support. I love that no matter how old you get, there's always a girl side and a boy side.
Brian and Melissa with their happy server, Kelsea.
Ashton and Landon on the rope pyramid. It was such a beautiful day.
After playing we went for a hike and their little boy eyes were on the look out for caterpillars. Landon was the first to find one. He loved it and took care of it all day. It even made it all the way home with us and then we had to let it outside so it could eat.
Ashton did finally find one of his own, with his brothers help. They were so excited!
We had such a good time together at the park while Daddy was at a boring meeting. We thought about going and rescuing him, but we didn't want to get him in trouble.
I love my boys and am so thankful for days like that Saturday. As they get older those days will be harder to find. I'm soaking it all up while I can. I tell them they will always be my babies, and let me tell you, they do not like to hear that. It always makes them laugh though. I am praying that God keeps a hold of them so tight; that He will protect them; be real to them and keep them close to him through the years to come.
